Anonymous
Beloved of All
Hi, I'm Samuel, I'm 18 years old. So this is what I have, I used to struggle with social anxiety and always prayed God for help, I remember it was terrible I got headaches always I was fearful, shy etcetera, I never used medication, so a friend offered me marijuana and like I had heard before that it could help social anxiety I thought that maybe that could help me, I didn't pretend to be a heavy user or become a drug addict just use it like medicine, well, so that friend gave me some marijuana in a little bag I remember and I waited like 2 weeks to try it, I was trying to smoke it but the wind didn't let me, so it looked easy to me to just eat it straight, raw.. I did it, I just ate the cigarette, it wasn't that much (0.7gram aprox), so everything was fine but 3 hours later I got what is called a ''bad trip'' I had a panic attack i think, my head was pounding, my body went numb, my mouth dry, felt pressure, I thought I was going to black out etc, it was a very fearful experience, well the thing is that I thought it would go away and I would accept my social anxiety to be nothing as bad as things like that and I would live happy forever, (well, I was happy but fearful) so the bad thing was that the next day I woke up with a feeling of still being drugged and it lasted like 2 weeks, it was when the ''worst'' starting to happen, I developed visual disturbances, I developed things called ''floaters'' cobwebs that looks like cells floating in my eye, light sensivity, dry eye, when I see a light it looks like a starburs, well a lot of visual disturbances it's been 4 months and they are still here, I feel like if I was drunk, it's very bad, doctors told me my eyes are healthy and I look through internet that this is something called visual snow and no cure is available for now, for a moment I felt destroyed, I felt very depressed because I started to see that in fact I would prefer a million times have social anciety than this, my social anxiety has dropped now but now I'm kind of depressed because this is so bad that I can't go out to enjoy because the sun bothers me and my visual disturbances give me headaches, I loved working out, I was very healthy before this happened, now I stopped working out because it seems to worsen my condition, well, I think God does everything for a reason I don't know what are his plans with me, I know he can heal me or make me know what should I do, I really need him more than ever, please pray for me, I know there's nothing impossible for my Lord, Mathew 21:22 If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer.'
So I need your help, pray for me, to feel better and be better, thank you, God bless you all.
So I need your help, pray for me, to feel better and be better, thank you, God bless you all.
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