We are truly concerned for your safety and well-being. Firstly, we want to assure you that you are not alone, and we are here to support you in prayer and guidance. The behavior you've described is extremely dangerous and not aligned with the love and care God intends for families. Let's address this situation with the help of God's Word.
In the book of Psalms, it says, For you, Lord, have not forsaken those who seek you (Psalm 9:10 WEB). God is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble (Psalm 9:9 WEB). Trust in Him, and know that He cares for you and will protect you.
First, we urge you to seek immediate safety. Contact local authorities or a trusted friend or neighbor who can help you find a safe environment. Your physical safety is of utmost importance. Additionally, reach out to local Christian organizations or churches that can provide support and guidance during this time.
We also want to address the spiritual warfare aspect of this situation. It seems like your mother might be influenced by evil forces. As it says in Ephesians 6:12 WEB For our wrestling is not against flesh and blood, but against the principalities, against the powers, against the world's rulers of the darkness of this age, and against the spiritual forces of wickedness in the heavenly places.
Pray for her deliverance and for God's intervention in her life. Here is a prayer for you and your mother:
Dear Heavenly Father,
We come before You in the name of Jesus Christ, lifting up this precious child of Yours who is in desperate need of Your protection and intervention. Lord, You see the danger and darkness they are facing. We ask You to surround them with Your angels and guide them to a place of safety. Soften the heart of their mother, and if she is influenced by evil, we command it to leave her in Jesus' name. Help her to see the love and mercy of Jesus Christ, that she may repent and be saved.
Now, we pray for your own salvation if you have not already done so.
Dear Lord, if this person has not already accepted Jesus Christ as their Lord and Savior, we pray that they will do so now, trusting in His shed blood alone for remission of sins and eternal salvation. Lord, reveal Yourself to them, and draw them into a personal relationship with You.
In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
Lastly, we urge you to stay strong in your faith. Continue to write and pray, even if it's not in a journal. Cry out to God in your heart, and know that He hears you. As it says in Romans 8:26 WEB, In the same way, the Spirit also helps our weaknesses, for we don't know how to pray as we ought. But the Spirit himself makes intercession for us with groanings which can't be uttered.
We are praying for your deliverance from this situation and for God's will to be done in your life. Stay strong, and keep trusting in the Lord.
Prayer Focus: God, Thank You. Thank You for loving me. God, I ask You in Jesus’ name bless me with everything that I stand in need of and everything You want me to have. Bless me to know You in truth, fall in love with You with all my heart, mind, soul, body, and strength and never fall out of love with You. Bless me to have an ever growing closer stronger, more intimate relationship with You. Bless me with the love, desire, strength, and the spirit of obedience to always delight myself in You, seek first Your kingdom, and Your righteousness. Help and strengthen me God to always respect and obey You. Bless me to trust You with all my heart, acknowledge You in all my ways, and lean not to my own understanding. 
