Haegfaras
Disciple of Prayer
I have been requesting prayers here for over 2 weeks now, for my business and husband. As it appears my husband is slowly making progress for recovery. His abscess in his liver has finally diminished in size from 7.7 cm to 5.2 cm. So, thank you to Jesus Christ for that. He is currently at the hospital getting another CT scan as we speak. We pray for continual progress for his health. As far as my business, it seems to continue to get dimmer. I spoke to my employee yesterday and let her know that I would have to let her go due to not enough business coming in. It pains me as she is pregnant and is in need of this job. I did tell her if it picked up, I would call her to come back. But that never leaves a settling feeling when you are in need either. I have 2 accounts that are pending that could potentially pull me through the hump for the moment and cover September and part of October. But I do not want to get my hopes up or count on it. I feel if I could get accounts to pull me through the end of the year, I just might make it until God's will be done. I thought of closing the doors and selling my business. I was extremely surprised to see my husband very supportive of me in this area. Since he got very ill in August, I have seen a change in him, like never before. He's been very loving, supportive, caring, understanding. The version before would be angry and adamant to continue and figure it out. He told me the other morning, "don't let what you cannot control ruin your day. It will be ok, that he could pay all the expenses but it would be very tight. That we would make it through." Here is my take on things at the moment: How do you know when it's God speaking to you? A part of me says, "Don't give up, you might be on the verge of your breakthrough blessings." But then, I think all the signs are pointing to closing because nothing is happening. What if it's God's will to close the doors and open another chapter and I'm resisting. But what if it's the enemy putting those thoughts in my head? I have been praying for God to reveal His will to me. That I cannot hear him, to send me a sign, to lead me in His path and His will be done. But, I feel no closer to an answer as I did 2 weeks ago. I feel at times I go into prayer without even the words to mumble, I just sit there not knowing what to say or think. My tears are dry, I stay connected throughout the day with worship music, listening to videos of Christian encouragement and Bible verses. Yet, I cannot hear anything.