Othaireurron
Prayer Warrior
I pray for my health to be better I pray for a new home I pray for a new job I pray for brighter days I pray to stay away from negative people I pray to heal all the pain that my mother has caused me it’s like she tears me down all the time for no apparent reason I don’t like her for that I want to move out of this house she don’t let me drive her truck she used to act funny when I would be inside her truck with her she would act weird around her bf and me and her would argue a lot as a parent I just don’t know if she feel as if she better or as if she can just go around picking on people but I pray that I don’t let her defeat me she would say mean things to me that bought me down she told me I was bigger than her and that I had gained weight and that my stomach was bigger than her she gave me fake keys when I had came out of the mental facility and I felt sad enough as it was I felt as if she didn’t want me to stay here with her me and her never really got along i pray to move away from her and not have her disrespect me its like she didnt even want to help me buy a car she would tell me to save up for a car but I felt as if she would never help me get one she never taught me how to drive her car and she would always act weird when I would put in public places with her it’s like she thought that she was better than me even when I would be sitting down she would be moving around as if she was this woman or person as if she was better or sexier than me I felt that it’s like she was competing with me she had said that I could sleep inside her bedroom then she would sleep inside of the living room I felt as if she was acting strange then I would catch the bus to a different town just to stay away from her and it would be really dark outside and I felt like I was alone I would be walking to the hospital a lot and she would be in the house my body felt different I felt strange I just pray that things become better for me I pray that I never have to go through what I went through with her ever again she left me inside of the house with no cable for two years I couldn’t watch tv or anything I barely had a working phone and I felt as if I was stuck alone I hated my life I pray that things get better for me I pray that I’m able to love myself more and able to take better care of myself I pray for my nerves to heal I feel as if the guy next door is always listening whenever I’m in the bed he did something with his body when I was sitting down inside of the bed with my back facing the wall and if I would move over or get out of the way he would throw things down he would even do things with his face because I felt as if somebody was staring through my face when I would be using the bathroom and soon as I turn the sink on to wash my hands or I get up and flush the toilet it’s like he knows and I used to hear him listening towards me when I would be asleep I overheard his wife say out loud that I was asleep I felt so mad I ended up throwing a bottle of hot sauce at the wall and it put a whole in it I hated this guy and his wife it’s like when I would walk on the wooden floors I could feel him listening To my feet when I would walk and I could feel him behind me on the opposite of the wall listening to me sleep I was scared of this man he was watching me when I was walking staring directly inside of my face I wasn’t bothering him or never said anything to him just walking inside of the building this man started whispering towards someone that was living with him for a period of time another grown man and the man begin to make faces at me he don’t know me then I told him I was going to get my uncle on him he told me to go get him and that he would get in his ass my uncle would of beat the breaks off that old man southern old man just running his mouth I don’t promote violence but he should have never approached me or said anything to me he was looking at me weird when he saw me sitting down inside of the building he didn’t want to speak to me and he walked past me and said hi but I could tell he didn’t want me to talk or speak with me something was definitely not right with this man and I didn’t do anything towards him and the fact that my mother still spoken to this man made me feel some kind of way as if I couldn’t trust her and she would still do the same thing with family members if I told her that they would mistreat me she would act a certain type of way and she would still talk and hang around them I don’t want her to hate but them but be on my team and support me and let me know you have my back as a parent I felt like I couldn’t trust when we get around other people she wasn’t even introducing me she was just doing her own thing I hated that and she would treat me like a lil kid I don’t mind her treating me like I’m younger but I felt as if she could have said something instead of not introducing me I felt as if something was not right with her and I told her what the guy did and what he said she told me it’s because I look bad and I don’t look right but who is he to say anything towards me about how I look or what’s going on with me he don’t know anything about me he was hating on me and trying to tear me down I don’t have time for people like that I pray to take better care of myself and love myself more and to forgive myself for wishing death on my mother and her bf they treated me very bad I hated this man he thought he was my dad I felt like he didn’t like me and tried to tear Me down bad and tried to make me feel unlike myself he didn’t care for me I felt that he told me that I need to start dressing like a girl because I would wear sweatpants a lot I just pray that things get better for me I wore sweatpants because I was comfortable and I wasn’t working or didn’t have no where to go I wore sweatpants for a very long Time I feel peoples negative energy this building tore me down for a long Time I felt as if people envied me or would talk down on me when they would see me and they didn’t even know me I hated the building ever since we first move inside of the building I felt like it was too spacious and way too open and Kind of small it’s like a studio apartment with high ceilings I wanted something better something that made me feel good and would make me feel at home I pray for my own home so I can relax and watch movies and listen to music and be able to take nice hot baths and showers and buy nice products for my skin and brush my teeth I had stopped doing all of those things because of people fear of them watching me fear of them listening towards me when I would be asleep I would stay with my aunt it wasn’t that bad the first time I stayed with her but the second time I felt as if I should have already been settled down and okay I stayed with her for three years about and healed from staying with my family back at home it was good for me I would be on my phone a lot chilling inside of the bedroom that’s mainly what I do on my free time I like to be alone and I like to read and watch videos because I feel as if people aren’t always good to be around I pray for brighter days I pray for healing from feeling that my cousin was watching me she definitely would rush me out of the bathroom and she would stand by the bathroom door until I finished doing what I was doing I felt like she was trying to intimidate me and I would see her rolling her eyes at me it was bad her stepfather said she had told her mother that she didn’t like me I felt as if she was competing with me I felt like something was not ok with her I pray that I heal from all the pain that she caused me and learn to take better care of myself I pray for a car so I can be around my family sometimes just to do things with them and be healthy and happy I pray for my health to be better and for me to start eating healthier foods I pray for strength and protection I pray that my ears become even I pray to heal from bad skin I pray for my teeth to grow back I pray that I’m able to cut my hair and start all over I have unhealthy hair and would like a fresh start I pray that the nerves inside of my body heal I pray for my father to heal from mental illness I pray for a new home I pray for a new car I pray for a new job I pray for everything inside of my body to function healthily and properly I pray for my head to go back to normal I pray to heal from flat feet I pray to heal from the tear in my back I pray to heal from depression and anxiety I pray to heal from schizophrenia and paranoia if I do have it because I’m not too sure if I do I do feel worried all the time but not paranoid I feel like my skin crawls when I see things and I just want to get back to myself I feel as if strange things were happening to me and I feel as if people were able to demolish me and treat me bad they was talking bad of me and making me feel a certain type of way I pray for healing I pray for a toothbrush that’s healthy I pray to change my diet and to start eating healthier I pray to workout more and to take better care of myself I pray that my hygiene heals and that the body odor I have goes away I feel like when I use the bathroom I still have body odor and I always smelled good never before had any body odor I pray that my hygiene gets better I pray to heal from how my uncle would treat me I felt like he didn’t like me I heard him say to himself that I wasn’t normal and he would do things with his fingers and his nerves when I would be asleep inside of his room I felt like he would be doing something from the living room like he was watching me Move he would wake me up in the morning to eat breakfast he lost patience dealing with me and talked down on me to his mother I’m not sure If he talked bad of me to his gf but he said that the mattress I went and used the bathroom on his gf had bought that for him I didn’t know and went on myself anyways I was struggling with getting up and going to the bathroom fear of noise on the Toilet my scalp felt weird even when I touch my hair I felt sensitive and I felt like I would have muscle spasms a lot and I hated myself I pray for healing and I pray for better days it’s like my mind didn’t seem normal my thoughts became spasms my head would rotate it felt weird I felt as if I touch something I would have a muscle spasm I felt as if the guy upstairs was trying to damage my thoughts and damage my brain cells and damage my mind and make me sad and depressed I could feel him trying to get inside of my head I was stressed out for years I just want to heal and start following my dreams I want to dance sing act and start my own business I want to create my own clothing line and I want my own place I pray that those things happen I pray for better days I pray for a new iPhone I pray for my back to heal and for my nerves inside of my body to heal I pray to lose weight I pray for my fingers to heal I pray for protection I pray to become a better woman I pray to not fear anyone