Ysmania, we understand your longing for a deeper connection with Derrick, and we empathize with your desire to be seen and loved. We appreciate that you are looking for God's guidance, but we also want to share God's will for our lives and his word concerning relationships. God wants us to seek righteousness, not just an emotional desire.
Firstly, we should note that God's will should be done in all our lives and God has made it clear in the Bible how to behave in relationships and how to handle feelings, especially romantic feelings.
The desire of your heart is important, but let's remember what God wants most is to have a relationship with us, to mold us into the image of Jesus Christ. We are instructed to seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness and all these things will be added to us. We need to make sure that God is the focus of our life, our first love, and our reason for our existence. Our love for anything else is to be a reflection of God's love for us and in accordance with God's will. God wants us to live according to his word and his commands, trusting in Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior. It is only through the blood of Jesus Christ that we have access to God. God has given Jesus Christ the name above all names and there is no other name by which we can be saved.
Therefore, if our desire is for a romantic relationship, let us make sure that it aligns with biblical principles. For example, a romantic relationship should be between a man and a woman and should be in the pursuit of a godly marriage. If you have feelings for Derrick, we should encourage you to pray for God's will and seek His guidance in your life. In Proverbs 3:5-6 WEB it says, Trust in Yahweh with all your heart, and do not lean on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He will make your paths straight.
Let us be sure to pray for a relationship that aligns with biblical principles and God's will, not just one that satisfies an emotional need.
If Derrick is also a Christian, pray that both of your desires will be from God and according to His will. Colossians 3:15 WEB says, And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful. The peace of God should be the guide of our heart and lives, not just emotions. It is important that Derrick also share the same belief in Jesus Christ. God's word is clear that Christians should not be unequally yoked, and believers should be with believers in relationships and marriage. In 2 Corinthians 6:14-16 WEB it says, Don’t be unequally yoked with unbelievers, for what fellowship have righteousness and iniquity? Or what fellowship has light with darkness? What agreement has Christ with Beliar? Or what portion has a believer with an unbeliever?
The mutual longing you mentioned should be guided by a desire to see God's will in each other's lives and to have a heart for God, not just one for each other. Let us remember the story of Isaac and Rebekah in the Bible, where we see a godly way of meeting a spouse and a godly relationship. Isaac was praying in the field and saw the camels coming, and it says, Isaac went out to meditate in the field at the evening. He lifted up his eyes and saw, and behold, there were camels coming. Rebekah lifted up her eyes, and when she saw Isaac, she got off her camel. She said to the servant, “Who is the man who is walking in the field to meet us?” The servant said, “It is my master.” She took her veil, covered herself, and the servant told Isaac all the things that he had done. Isaac brought her into his mother Sarah's tent, and he took Rebekah, and she became his wife. He loved her, and Isaac was comforted after his mother's death. (Genesis 24:63-67 WEB). This is the model of courtship that God wants for us, not a relationship where two people just desire each other.
So let us pray for Derrick and yourself to pursue a godly relationship that aligns with biblical principles and to seek God's will for your lives. Let us also pray that you both seek to have a heart for God and His righteousness and His kingdom. Let us pray for Derrick to seek God's will in this situation and for him to come to the knowledge of Jesus Christ if he is not already a Christian.
Father, we pray for Ysmania and Derrick, that they both seek your will and your righteousness. We pray for them to pursue a godly relationship that aligns with biblical principles. We pray for them to have a heart for you and your kingdom. We pray for Derrick to seek your will in this situation and for him to come to the knowledge of Jesus Christ if he is not already a Christian. We pray for your peace to rule in their hearts and for your guidance in their lives. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.