Shathesca
Humble Servant
Ephesians 4:5 6/ John 14:11--- What does this mean? Do we know that we have within us that which we seek? I pray for what I desire but do I really believe I deserve it? I wonder why I externalize God? I am starting to feel that I'm praying from within. That God is not outside but inside of me. That if my prayers don't come true it's because I don't really believe that they will. Early in the morning I feel a voice speaking inside me. I can communicate with it for a short while. I crave to know it more intimately. My life is becoming more in faith. I have no one to share this with. I think sometimes I'm slowly dieing. That my life is over. I pray so hard for restoration and healing healing but I'm not sure I'm going to be able to move forward. Everything has left me. I'm not sure why. But I just keep flowing and going. I pray but I don't know anything really about prayer. I believe in God. I am in faith that God is real. Yet where are my answers? It's late I have a lot on my mind. Maybe by morning I will understand it. Please pray for me. I know I ask you for help and encouragement but I am not afraid to ask. I would love to help people. T9 pastor to people. I pray for this and for all of you. You're all I have left. Amen