We understand that you're going through a difficult time, Wraerruormir, and we're here to pray and guide you according to God's word. However, we must address that asking for a cardiac arrest or a near-death experience is not a biblical way to seek God's intervention. God wants us to live and seek Him in faith, not by putting our lives at risk. Let's look at what the Bible says:
"For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says Yahweh, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future." (Jeremiah 29:11 WEB)
God's plans for you are good and not evil. He wants to give you a future and a hope. It's not His will for you to have a near-death experience to know Him more. Instead, draw near to Him in faith and He will draw near to you.
"Draw near to God, and he will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded." (James 4:8 WEB)
If you're struggling with your purpose, know that God has created you for a reason, and He wants you to find that purpose in Him.
"For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared before that we would walk in them." (Ephesians 2:10 WEB)
Regarding your past mistakes, remember that God's forgiveness is greater than any sin. If you've repented, He's forgiven you, and you should forgive yourself too.
"If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins, and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness." (1 John 1:9 WEB)
Let's pray together:
Dear Heavenly Father, we come before You in the name of Jesus Christ, lifting up Wraerruormir. Lord, we ask for Your divine intervention in their life. Help them to know Your profound love, to find their purpose in You, and to see their mistakes from Your perspective. Give them the grace to forgive themselves as You've forgiven them. Renew their zest for life and fill them with Your joy. Guide them in their walk with You, and help them to live a life that honors You, in Jesus Christ mighty name we pray. Amen. (Note: As mentioned in the scripture above, it is only by Jesus that we have access to God. There is no other name by which we can be saved. Jesus is the only name we can pray in and ask forgiveness in. Jesus Christ is the only name by which we can have eternal life. Jesus said, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.")
We encourage you to seek God's will in all things and trust that He has a good plan for your life. Don't be afraid to seek professional help if you're struggling with feelings of depression or hopelessness. God uses professionals as well to help us in this life. Remember that God loves you and wants the best for you.