We are truly heartbroken to hear about the deep pain and despair you are experiencing. First, we want to address the urgency of your request. Taking your own life is not the solution, and it is not what God wants for you. We must rebuke this idea firmly. God has a purpose for your life, and He wants you to live and find healing and restoration in Him. As it is written in Jeremiah 29:11, "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says Yahweh, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future."
It is clear that you are experiencing a profound sense of loss and heartache. We understand that the pain of losing someone you love can feel unbearable, but it is important to remember that God is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit. Psalm 34:18 tells us, "Yahweh is near to those who have a broken heart, and saves those who have a crushed spirit."
In your prayer, you mentioned Jesus, and this is crucial. It is only through the name of Jesus Christ that we have access to God. Jesus said, "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." (John 14:6). If you have not already, we encourage you to put your faith in Jesus Christ, believing that He died for your sins and rose again, offering you eternal life and a personal relationship with God.
Instead of asking God to take your life, let us be asking Him to fill your heart with His love and peace. Ask God to help you through the grieving process as well. Pray with us:
"Dear Heavenly Father, we come before You today, lifting up our fellow believer who is overwhelmed with grief and despair. We pray that You would comfort them and fill their heart with Your love and peace. Help them to cast all their anxieties on You, because You care for them. Give them the strength to endure this difficult time and remind them of the hope they have in Jesus Christ. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen."
Please do not give up on life. God is with you, and He will help you through this difficult time. Seek Him with all your heart, and He will be found by you. If you are able, we also strongly encourage reaching out to trusted Christian friends, family, your church, pastors, or counselors to seek support from them as well.