Swantalelf, we hear the deep pain and despair in your words, and our hearts go out to you. First and foremost, we want to remind you that your life is precious in Gods eyes. He has a purpose for you, and your story is not over. Your persistence is the evidence. Our Heavenly Father has not given us at heart of fear, but love, power and a sound mind. In Jesus name we pray together for this mind to flood your heart and break the bonds which currently seem thick and unbreakable. Together we have authority over death, even as it advances, we advance with an army of believers and Angels at your call to establish and uphold your life. Stay with us.
**Please break my bonds with my family** now this line must be approached directly. We are not called to break bonds, but to restore them, to honor them no matter how hard it might be. The bond between family members, especially between a parent and children, is ordained by God. There is healing in it even if it is difficult to see at this time. The Word of God tells us, “Honor your father and your mother, as Yahweh your God commanded you; that your days may be long, and that it may go well with you, in the land which Yahweh your God gives you.” (Deuteronomy 5:16, WEB).
Even when our communication with our loved ones is difficult or we are in pain it is not the time to turn our backs. God will restore that which the enemy has taken if you ask and allow. For God will restore everything that the locusts shall eat. Do not take this literally, but as healing and prosperity in the fullness of your life and family! Allow God to bring forth restoration in your relationships.
First make sure your family members understand who God is. Tell them “there is salvation in none other, for neither is there any other name under heaven, that is given among men, wherein we must be saved.” (Acts 4:12, WEB). Without salvation, the blessings of God and healthy family bonds would be pointless for any family member left behind. Now lets see,
**Forgive and forget the past** is an important step when our heart is ready. Often when there are communication problems, there are issues in the heart and what we perceive and expect is not what we communicate to our loved ones. This has to be addressed and it can be done if you and each member is willing to discuss the communication problem and have a willing heart to approach it.
Brotherly love is the value of your bond in your family, even when it does not seem like it. “Brotherly love continues…Do not be lacking in diligence. Be fervent in spirit; serving the Lord.” (Romans 12:10-11, WEB). Sometimes we want to love in our own strength and forget family members are also a gift from God, and a part of our family serving Jesus and honoring him. They need us to pray for them. Our love is to be a reflection of God’s love. Before making decisions about leaving your love ones alone, or only focusing on their hurtful behavior, seek Gods wisdom. Bring your burdens to him first and communicate with him an ally of your family. It is easy to want to walk away or act rashly when we are facing disappointment and pain, but in Christ and our family there is always a better way. To walk away from our family is not a small decision. It is difficult to imagine, being a Christian believer who is by faith resolute and mature, and has a genuine willingness to lay down their life for their family as Christ did for the church would want to walk away unless the Holy Spirit commanded or it was not a safe place to be if there was sin, immorality, or possible danger for perpetuating illegitimate sin. This is because it would be out of the Will of God to allow this or encourage such sin.
But to create an extra hurtful burden for a child, another loved one, or our parents to carry while encouraging them to maintain their faith is not right or just. Allow God to continue healing at the foot of the cross with a humble heart trusting he is on our side UNLESS or until he convicts you. Therefore, it is important for you to pursue your family towards good communication striving to understand and being diligent in your faith, and meeting the financial needs you can, which only by Gods’ provision and wisdom can it be done as you mentioned.
Even as the scriptures say, “For if any is not obedient to the word, they report those who are, and not those who are not. For it is not the hearers of the law who are righteous before God, but the doers of the law will be justified” (Romans 2:13, WEB). Therefore, as scripture says, “First take the log out of your own eye, and then you will see clearly to take the speck out of your brothers.” (Matthew 7:5, WEB) Do not give in to despair and hopelessness. It is not from God but rather an attack from the enemy. The same is true for feeling like your life is a waste. God sees you as valuable and worthy of love.
The above scriptures are not meant to convict as someone who needs more condemnation, but there is a true hope of salvation for you and your family at the foot of the cross. Repentance is a power which you, we all receive. In life dragging on when there is pain, it is important to seek God’s purpose in the midst of suffering. We will have trouble in this world but we can take heart for Christ too has overcome the world. Your life is not a waste. God can use your experiences, both good and bad, to shape you into the person He created you to be and to draw closer. He has a plan and God uses the trials of this life to strengthen and refine us.
No matter how difficult this may be in suffering, we are called to have compassion and love toward those who may have caused pain. Our personal self-control as believers as our personal sacrifice and examples of faith we invisibly lay down at their feet. It is a powerful symbol towards conviction. We can only do this by his power and authority. That being said, a financial distribution, allowance, or provision which would encourage perpetuating ungodly behavior would not be merciful, compassionate, or characterized in God as enabling behavior. We must be careful to consider our role as a provider for our family, and ensure that such funds we entrust to one another are being used as an earthly provision rather than part of a sinful and rebellious lifestyle. If there is a serious issue in the household it must be addressed first before provision is made. Study Ephesians 5:11 “have no fellowship with the unfruitful works of darkness, but rather expose them.” And study Matthew 7:23 “And then I will declare to them, ‘I never knew you; depart from Me, you who practice lawlessness!’ ”
Something worth thinking about is by effecting a party in their glorification by living life only in a lawless and immoral way is to themselves an act of lawlessness. We are one when we are with each other. Therefore, be cautious and have discernment over where compassion can be confused with greed and approved unfruitful, or lawless behavior. This happens in many Christian communities, homes, and churches today. What is happening in the world is confusion is perpetuating what feels good and everyone is doing it. This is not the standard of God but only a deception based on emotion. We must be wise and bold to address what is sinful and be ready to bring our struggles to the light. Hence, by providing and loving with no expectation of responsibility there is no holy expectation to what a member will be held accountable for in a loving manner. This is not fair or a complete heart of love. If it was scripture would be different.
In love your financial contribution should show genuine expectation to contributing in a Godly manner to your family. Say no to cause a Holy conviction. Say yes to an open accountable heart which will produce good fruit and Gospel actions in our homes. Together we pray that you may be able to let go of your hurt and past mistakes and trust that God can heal and restore your family and your bonds together. Live to see what God can do through relationships with one another. Though you can let go of the past, ensure your heart is in a place of repentance, wisdom, and willingness to build the body of the family in Christ back together.
Let us pray now. Lord Jesus, we are told to bind and lose things on earth, to guard our hearts and his heart. To love him with all our might, heart and soul and your neighbor as ourselves. Representing you Jesus we reject spirits of suicide, and death, despair, and depression. We come against and rebuke the heaviness weighing down for the lies of hopelessness that Swantalelf has been wrestling against. In Jesus names we declare breakthroughs and spiritual victory in Swantalelfs heart, home, and mind right now. We stand with you as you repent and turn to God. Give you the strength and courage to face each day, knowing that You are with you for an amazing plan and purpose. Let love, grace, forgiveness, and truths fill this home with peace and order in Jesus’ name, in Jesus name we pray for you to be healed from the inside out and have the strength to continue the good fight of faith. We praise You for the healing and restoration that you might do in your heart and life. In Jesus’ name, we pray.