Let's lift up Threynorlake's need for articles. "And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him" (Rom 8:28). Trusting Jesus to provide the necessary resources. In Jesus' name! 
**Prayer Updates!** 
**Salvation**: Let's pray for 
In Jesus' name! 
treeoflife
Account Closed
Dear Jesus Christ, its Your servant Michael. Don't know if You're listening to me anymore God, and I don't know if You care. I feel low, like You personally have sought my harm and pain. You brought me into this world to be shamed at the altar of my God, who is my true treasure, days before my wedding, and here I am a broken man and I am wearing my shame with me where I go. I feel low like death. Part of me I feel is buried in the earth, and the rest of me longs to join it. Where are You Christ? Jesus, am I so leprous and evil that the hand of God won't make me whole again? Am I so detestable that You won't hear me? Or is this Your design, to have me ripped apart by the dogs and the evil men of this world?
Why won't my Savior, the one who is promised to sinners like me, act and bring me salvation, and healing? Christ Jesus, how long do You think I can last as Your worshipper in this state? I will tell you ahead of time my Lord, I cannot last. I am no good for trials like this one. I have already failed Your test. I have already dishonored You, and broken promises and vows, done many things I probably should not have done, trying to fill the hole that You placed in my life.
If I am supposed to be thankful to God right now, Jesus, it is very hard for me to be thankful. I am torn between looking at all the beauty You have placed in the world, and being thankful, and then looking at the curses that You have failed to remove from my life, failing where You said You were and are and will be success. I knock on Your door God, in my broken state, and when You don't answer You break Your own vow. I get angry. Angry that You allowed me to be embarrassed approaching Your altar, angry that You cursed my life which I dedicated to You in my youth. Angry that You've all but disowned me. My mind begs my heart the question why I pay You continuous prayers, why I continue to come to Your mercy seat, why I do any good thing I do, why I ask when You don't answer me, why I beg when You don't come near me, why I am even trying, why I go to church, why I am doing all the things I'm doing in Your name.
I tell myself its God's promise, and I am simply impatient. But the dishonors don't seem to stop, I am not some servant You have showered with blessings - I am a lowly man. I work a really bad job, and now I am going to have to work two. People tell me, when I look for love, which is the SOLE BLESSING I SEEK, that I am thirsty, that I will 'be alone forever', and that no one could want me. I am starting to believe these words. I am starting to feel low, and disowned by the heavenly Father. I am starting to feel cursed, and wanting to run away from what looks and feels like abuse.
If You're a cruel and evil God who seeks my harm: I guess You succeeded, I am broken. If Your enemies have done this to me, and You are all powerful, I do not know why You don't stop them and turn the tide in my life. I am waiting on You God, but I will tell You Jesus, High Priest of the Lord I AM THAT I AM that I am not able to bear this burden. It is painful to death. I can't and won't do it. You gave me power over my own will, insomuch as I know when to quit. And sometimes Lord, in the absence of Your response after repeated petitions, the quit button looks very tempting.
So act now, Jesus Christ SON OF GOD. Act. Wake up in the ship. The storm is ravaging Your servant. Its tearing me completely apart, and You are doing nothing about it. That has to stop, unless You desire to write on my heart that You are an abusive and cruel God. That Your promises for me are not true, maybe for others, but not for me. Its a relationship, which is two ways, Jesus. And I am not going to pay a toll on a highway I can't drive on, walk on, crawl on, or anything else. If I can't travel, turn Your face from me, Eternal God. Disown me. If You won't answer me, then completely disown me. If You won't hear my prayers, put Yourself, my worship of You, and everything else, completely out of my life. I am sick to death with asking You for the answers, and You rendering silence. Enough is enough, God. This man is at his limit.
Let the whole body of Christ Jesus hear my prayer, because I am suffering. Amen in Jesus Christ's name.
Why won't my Savior, the one who is promised to sinners like me, act and bring me salvation, and healing? Christ Jesus, how long do You think I can last as Your worshipper in this state? I will tell you ahead of time my Lord, I cannot last. I am no good for trials like this one. I have already failed Your test. I have already dishonored You, and broken promises and vows, done many things I probably should not have done, trying to fill the hole that You placed in my life.
If I am supposed to be thankful to God right now, Jesus, it is very hard for me to be thankful. I am torn between looking at all the beauty You have placed in the world, and being thankful, and then looking at the curses that You have failed to remove from my life, failing where You said You were and are and will be success. I knock on Your door God, in my broken state, and when You don't answer You break Your own vow. I get angry. Angry that You allowed me to be embarrassed approaching Your altar, angry that You cursed my life which I dedicated to You in my youth. Angry that You've all but disowned me. My mind begs my heart the question why I pay You continuous prayers, why I continue to come to Your mercy seat, why I do any good thing I do, why I ask when You don't answer me, why I beg when You don't come near me, why I am even trying, why I go to church, why I am doing all the things I'm doing in Your name.
I tell myself its God's promise, and I am simply impatient. But the dishonors don't seem to stop, I am not some servant You have showered with blessings - I am a lowly man. I work a really bad job, and now I am going to have to work two. People tell me, when I look for love, which is the SOLE BLESSING I SEEK, that I am thirsty, that I will 'be alone forever', and that no one could want me. I am starting to believe these words. I am starting to feel low, and disowned by the heavenly Father. I am starting to feel cursed, and wanting to run away from what looks and feels like abuse.
If You're a cruel and evil God who seeks my harm: I guess You succeeded, I am broken. If Your enemies have done this to me, and You are all powerful, I do not know why You don't stop them and turn the tide in my life. I am waiting on You God, but I will tell You Jesus, High Priest of the Lord I AM THAT I AM that I am not able to bear this burden. It is painful to death. I can't and won't do it. You gave me power over my own will, insomuch as I know when to quit. And sometimes Lord, in the absence of Your response after repeated petitions, the quit button looks very tempting.
So act now, Jesus Christ SON OF GOD. Act. Wake up in the ship. The storm is ravaging Your servant. Its tearing me completely apart, and You are doing nothing about it. That has to stop, unless You desire to write on my heart that You are an abusive and cruel God. That Your promises for me are not true, maybe for others, but not for me. Its a relationship, which is two ways, Jesus. And I am not going to pay a toll on a highway I can't drive on, walk on, crawl on, or anything else. If I can't travel, turn Your face from me, Eternal God. Disown me. If You won't answer me, then completely disown me. If You won't hear my prayers, put Yourself, my worship of You, and everything else, completely out of my life. I am sick to death with asking You for the answers, and You rendering silence. Enough is enough, God. This man is at his limit.
Let the whole body of Christ Jesus hear my prayer, because I am suffering. Amen in Jesus Christ's name.
