R
rikkylynch
Guest
Dear God,
Hi. Since high school and my parents getting divorce at the same time,my life has been nothing been a joke! What I do or try,it seems to go downhill from relationships to jobs to money. its been 24 yrs and I am very sad,depressed and sometimes suicidal. I am too shy,lonely,quiet person and dont socialize with people that much. I just wish wish I wasnt born like this. Ive tryied to take care of myself by living alone and that too went not too well. Ive never had a steady job in my entire life. All the money i get from my work,I try to save,but it seems to go away to things I have to pay like rent and bills. In 2007,my life really really started going downhill. I got fired from one job,and also lost my other job since i didnt have a car for work(it was stolen from my garage),I also had to end my apartment lease since i didnt have enough money to pay rent. I had no one in my family to turn to for help or supports. I then called my cousins from California and they decided to take me in and help me out. January 2008,I started my new job the next day I arrived(my cousin got me the job BEFORE I moved to CA(yes,i even took the bus ride with only $60 in my pocket). After 5 months of working,I got myself a new car. Things went well till 2010,i did something i really really regret cuz it actually cost me my job position of november 2011. Since i started as a temperary employee,i was never offered for permanent job but the company decided to still let me work there. I know EXACTLY why am not a permnament till this day..Btw, i started to drink liquor every night before bed becuase i cant sleep normal like other peoples. Drinking was what caused me to NOT get hired within my company becuase I wrote a "dirty naughty" message to one of my co-worker. Gosh,i feel so bad right now. November 2011,I got laid off from my work and hasnt been working since. Recently,They started calling other temps to go back to work but the company didnt bother to call me back. Ive been with the company for 5 yrs also(my ONLY job in CA). Its been almost 3 months and i still cant find a job. I applied for unemployment benefits but was denied.My money is getting very low and I have rent/bills to pay. Btw,am still living with my cousins. Without money/job,am very afraid I dont know how I am gonna pay for anything. If i didnt get laid off,I wouldnt be soo sad and depressed right now. Bottom line God,can you please tell me my life will get better. Please help me get thru these rough times. I know you know EVERYTHING about me. I just wanna stop being soo lonely,quiet,sad,depressed all the time. I just wanna have a normal life just like any person out there. Please God, help me!!! Why am I the way I am????
Hi. Since high school and my parents getting divorce at the same time,my life has been nothing been a joke! What I do or try,it seems to go downhill from relationships to jobs to money. its been 24 yrs and I am very sad,depressed and sometimes suicidal. I am too shy,lonely,quiet person and dont socialize with people that much. I just wish wish I wasnt born like this. Ive tryied to take care of myself by living alone and that too went not too well. Ive never had a steady job in my entire life. All the money i get from my work,I try to save,but it seems to go away to things I have to pay like rent and bills. In 2007,my life really really started going downhill. I got fired from one job,and also lost my other job since i didnt have a car for work(it was stolen from my garage),I also had to end my apartment lease since i didnt have enough money to pay rent. I had no one in my family to turn to for help or supports. I then called my cousins from California and they decided to take me in and help me out. January 2008,I started my new job the next day I arrived(my cousin got me the job BEFORE I moved to CA(yes,i even took the bus ride with only $60 in my pocket). After 5 months of working,I got myself a new car. Things went well till 2010,i did something i really really regret cuz it actually cost me my job position of november 2011. Since i started as a temperary employee,i was never offered for permanent job but the company decided to still let me work there. I know EXACTLY why am not a permnament till this day..Btw, i started to drink liquor every night before bed becuase i cant sleep normal like other peoples. Drinking was what caused me to NOT get hired within my company becuase I wrote a "dirty naughty" message to one of my co-worker. Gosh,i feel so bad right now. November 2011,I got laid off from my work and hasnt been working since. Recently,They started calling other temps to go back to work but the company didnt bother to call me back. Ive been with the company for 5 yrs also(my ONLY job in CA). Its been almost 3 months and i still cant find a job. I applied for unemployment benefits but was denied.My money is getting very low and I have rent/bills to pay. Btw,am still living with my cousins. Without money/job,am very afraid I dont know how I am gonna pay for anything. If i didnt get laid off,I wouldnt be soo sad and depressed right now. Bottom line God,can you please tell me my life will get better. Please help me get thru these rough times. I know you know EVERYTHING about me. I just wanna stop being soo lonely,quiet,sad,depressed all the time. I just wanna have a normal life just like any person out there. Please God, help me!!! Why am I the way I am????