Swantalelf, we appreciate your honest and heartfelt prayer request. You've come help seeking God's guidance in Jesus name, and we are here to pray with you and provide biblical counsel. First, let's address the issues you've raised and align them with biblical principles.
You mentioned hurting someone with your words and asking for forgiveness. The Bible tells us, A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger. The tongue of the wise adorns knowledge, but the mouth of the fool gushes folly. (Proverbs 15:1-2 WEB) and Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving each other, just as God also in Christ forgave you. (Ephesians 4:32 WEB) It's important to extend this forgiveness to others, as well as humbling yourself and asking for forgiveness when you've wronged someone. We will pray for this person and your desire to forgive and grow in kindness. It is a life long process, but easy as we grow in Him.
Regarding your husband, praying God shows him his mistakes and he gets help is appropriate. However, you said that you felt like you needed to separate from him so that he would appreciate you. It is not a biblical concept to cause or pursue a separation primarily so the other spouse would appreciate You. It's important to consider God's view of marriage, What therefore God has joined together, let no man separate. (Mark 10:9
There are valid reasons for separating, but the issue is not for them to appreciate us and it should not involve violating biblical boundaries. You will find a discussion of them in the scriptures.It is more loving to confront your spouse about how you feel then to separate. We find God will bless this kind of confrontation in His will.
You also mentioned hoping your husband might change, and it is a great thing to have faith and hope in your spouse. However you are solely responsible to God for your behavior. If you need to separate for a godly reason, then you can and he will need to deal with that. You do not need to feel you must separate for him to change. The Bible tells us, Wives, be subject to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the assembly, being himself the savior of the body. (Ephesians 5:22-23 WEB) and Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the assembly, and gave himself up for it. (Ephesians 5:25 WEB) Do not rely on feelings for your only guidance, but commit yourself to God. Read these verses in Ephesians and pray for God's guidance and wisdom.We take note Your concern for his behavior is based in his needing a relationship with Jesus Christ and as his behavior changes with transformation into the likeness of Christ, he can make amends with His children and family. We want to point out this is only possible when he is a Believer in Jesus Christ.
It's also important to address how God wants us to handle debt. Your mention of your husband paying back his debt is commendable, but the Bible cautions about taking on financial obligations.(See Romans 13:8) It is vital that you and your husband work to and clear debt and have boundaries in place to avoid debt so that you are financially a blessing and our children and children's children are as well. Work on debt by you and your husband to have a better view of it and begin to change the finances in your. You will be so blessed when you are not longer tied to the pay back of borrowings.
Now, let's pray together:
Heavenly Father,
We come before You in the name of Jesus, lifting up Swantanelf and her family. Lord, we ask for Your forgiveness on her behalf for the harsh words she spoke, and we pray that You would soften the heart of the person she hurt, granting them a spirit of forgiveness. Help them both to move forward in restoration, and a further commitment to growth in You.
Lord, we pray for Swantalelf's husband and children. That their hearts may be miraculously changed and restored to You. We also pray for his behavior and the financial situation of their household to change. Convict, draw, and deliver him to be conformed to Your image. While there may be a hexing debt, we ask You for the strength of Swantalelf and her family that the debt should be cleared.
In closing, We want to affirm a commitment to You and submit You as Lord of her life. She asks for more knowledge about You, Jesus; because no one has access to the Father without the Son.(See John 14:6) We pray she will continue in her commitment to learn and believe in the Holy Spirit, through Jesus' Name, as well as to be made holy with them all. Show her the power of worshipping You through Your word and in Your will.
In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen!