We are here with you, Plethiarh, and we deeply care about your situation. First, we want to address that the Bible tells us that our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms.Ephesians 6:12 WEB. So, we must put on the full armor of God so that we can resist the devil.
We see that you are experiencing depression, hallucinations, and a general feeling of unhappiness. Firstly, we want to remind you that you are precious to God and to us. God created you in His image and you are loved by Him.
He said "For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says Yahweh, thoughts of peace, and not of evil, to give you hope and a future." Jeremiah 29:11 WEB
Also,
"For God so loved the world, that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish, but have eternal life." John 3:16 WEB
Now, it's important to address that you mentioned you wanted to become the happiest person and to find self-love. While God wants us to be joyful and to love others as we love ourselves, it's crucial to understand that our ultimate goal as believers is to glorify God. We should continuously work on improving and learning, allowing ourselves to be used by God to bring hope and salvation to others. Self-love and happiness are a reflection of Christ in us. Self-love is not some egoistic manner reflecting on our presence in the world, but is solely based on the fact that we are loved by God. We also know that live in a world of hardships so it is only in Jesus that we are complete. Therefore we recognize any blessings come through Him.
"For in him we live, and move, and have our being. As some of your own poets have said, For we are also his offspring." Acts 17:28 WEB
The spirits of this world and our own flesh seek only happiness at the expense of the true joy of serving others.What will ultimately satisfy us is a right relationship with God. Peace, contentment, and joy are byproducts of that relationship, not things that we can achieve by focusing solely on happiness. So we pray that you find your true joy and happiness in connect with Jesus, and that you Administrator it through serving others.
When it comes to negative thinking, the Bible tells us to take every thought captive to obey Christ.2 Corinthians 10:5 WEB. We have the power, through the Holy Spirit, to control our thoughts and to focus on whatever is true, whatever is honorable, whatever is just, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is commendable, if there is any excellence, if there is anything worthy of praise, we will be thinking about these things, adopting the attitude of the Apostle Paul.Philippians 4:8 WEB
Let's pray together:
Dear Heavenly Jesus,
We come before You, lifting up Plethiarh. Lord, You know the struggles that they are facing, the depression, the hallucinations, the unhappiness. We pray, Lord Jesus, that You would intervene, that You would touch Plethiarh's mind, body, and spirit, and bring healing and restoration. Give them God's holy joy.
Help Plethiarh to fix their eyes on You, to find their value and worth in Your plans and purposes, and or them to You. Guide them by Your Holy Spirit, convicting them when their thoughts do not align with Your truth and empowering them to take those that are ungodly captive.
And most importantly, Lord, please be with Plethiarh through Your holy spirit, leading them through this life that is dangerous and has many false paths in to what is both safe and pleasing to you.
We ask this all in Your precious name Jesus, Amen.
Remember though that In Yahweh have I put my trustand within Yahweh hoping in him; but as for man, I trust not.Micah 7:5 WEB. We are here for you. Our task is to encourage and support you and pray together with you in love, but only Jesus is the savior that can comfort your soul in perfect peace.