broken winged
Humble Prayer Warrior
As I stood before the court with a broken heart and ONLY the intentions to chastise my son for the crimes and offenses against US HIS family I had to choose to send him another week to detention. I have struggled many ways to ensure he has services set for him to be released yet those doors seem to be closed regardless of how much insisited. The attorney adlietem seems to be swayed to putting him into a residential ignoring that my child deserves a chance to redeem himself. The state seems to favor this ideal. I believe now it is up to the judge who I hope is the same as last court date because the ones who should support family are not interested in doing so. I feel as if I were a joke to them and am seen as ignorant and the same as the pool they draw me from hypothetically. I desire what is in the best interest of my son and at this point am quite confused as to what road that is. I have never been truly supported by those in authority and hoped that with all the steps I took that this time would be different yet that is to be seen. I fought for a furlow so that I could take my son to an intake that would open the door to obtaining his meds or at least get his primary physician to order the meds for him until services pick up. I guess I am to do yet another new thing that pains me and move out the way. THIS is HARD for he IS my first born and IS my heart. I am soo torn and very tired but somehow optimistic regardless of the odds. I ask that God protect my son from harm during and after his stay in detention for there are many who desire to hurt him just to feel themselves important. Please God protect him from the seen and unseen for I can only request from the position I am. After 17 years of struggle this CAN'T be how this story unfolds father. Please help me to be offered a way that protects all of my five children and keeps us together... all seven of us. I can't believe that the only resolve and option that comes to mind to them is division instead of strict rules in place with the consequence of a longer stay of detention over his head so that he may return HOME. It is as if the decision to send him back ment nothing to them as i saw my broken hearted son walk away as he was sent back to detention. I heard CLEARLY what the adlietem said.. "He needs a change of environment"; yet THIS is what I have been trying to do for the past seven years... MOVE with the assistance of the housing authority. I don't care if it is in Wullimantic or Bristol or anywhere at this time as long as the floor plan meets my families needs and the utilities are included where it IS affordable to accept. I have prayed and claimed these sites in Jesus Christ name and spiritually walked around these homes as if there were a wall of Jericho around them so that the walls would fall and I could claim at least one of them as home. A new environment is what I have been trying to achieve the only way I can afford how. Please father do not allow them to divide us for family is all that I have and all that I have wanted in this life; I do not see why I have had to fight soo hard to keep and protect my blessings. All that i have endured and suffered are nothing if it means to keep my family. Please father hear my plea and return my baby home. If I could only take him home now you know that I would with the strict conditions necessary for him NOT to fall back into what led him to be in there in the first place. Please father save my son. May YOUR will always be done and for me to accept it even if it hurts for you know what is needed father. In Jesus Christ name... Amen.