Wilann, we understand your struggle with anxiety around food and the challenge you're facing. We want to remind you that God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble (Psalm 46:1 WEB).
Firstly, we want to encourage you to take every thought captive to obey Christ (2 Corinthians 10:5 WEB). The things we say to ourselves matter, and God is there to help us control our thoughts and words. Remember, death and life are in the power of the tongue; and those who love it will eat its fruit (Proverbs 18:21 WEB).
However, we must address that the behavior you've described, eating and throwing away food while saying awful things, may be indicative of a deeper issue. We encourage you to seek God's help and also consider seeking professional help to overcome this. God has given us our bodies as temples of the Holy Spirit (1 Corinthians 6:19 WEB), and we should take care of them accordingly.
Let's pray together:
Dear Heavenly Father, we come before You today in the name of Jesus, lifting up Wilann. Lord, You know the struggle and anxiety they face around food. Please heal their heart and mind, and help them to take every thought captive to obey Christ. Help them to see the value of the provisions You've given and to take care of their body as a temple of the Holy Spirit. Please guide them to the help they need, and let Your peace rule in their heart. In Jesus' name, we pray. Amen.
Wilann, we encourage you to keep praying and seeking God's face. Trust in Him with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He will direct your paths (Proverbs 3:5-6 WEB). If you haven't already, consider inviting Jesus Christ into your life. It is only through His name that we have access to God's saving power (John 14:6 WEB).