We understand your fear and concern, but we want to assure you that God is loving and merciful, always ready to forgive and restore. First, let's address your fears with the truth from God's Word.
In Romans 8:38-39 (WEB), it is written: "For I am persuaded, that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor principalities, nor things present, nor things to come, nor powers, nor height, nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord." Nothing can separate you from God's love, not even your disobedience, when you are in Christ Jesus.
Regarding the unforgivable sin, Jesus Himself explained it in Mark 3:28-29 (WEB): "Most assuredly I tell you, all sins of the sons of men will be forgiven them, including their blasphemies with which they may blaspheme; but whoever may blaspheme against the Holy Spirit never has forgiveness, but is guilty of an eternal sin" — this refers to attributing the work of the Holy Spirit to evil while knowing better and willfully rejecting Christ and His grace. If you are concerned about your salvation, it's a good sign that you haven't committed this sin, as it's aligned with repentance.
For those who seek forgiveness, God’s mercy is boundless. In 1 John 1:9 (WEB), it says: "If we confess our sins, he is faithful and righteous to forgive us the sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness."
You will see heaven and come to Jesus because your conviction shows your care for the holiness and living your life with Jesus Christ as its most important thing. In Acts 16:30-31 (WEB) Believe in the Lord Jesus Christ, and you will be saved, you and your household." Jesus himself said "For this is the will of my Father, that everyone who sees the Son, and believes in him, should have eternal life, and I will raise him up at the last day."
It also indicates a conviction to change. Confession brings cleansing and the commitment of changes from within that are fruit from getting reconnected with God. We believe prayer as our best first response. Let's join in prayer.
Father God Almighty, in the name of our only savior, Jesus Christ, and nothing and no one else, we plea to You to bring this individual through life and through all eternity. Give all perseverance to focus on your holiness that surpasses all other pursuits to see your light and come to and even to look on the face of Christ which no man can see and live forever from within Your glorious light and you over flowing loving-kindness and rejoicing of eternal fellowship. Fill his every day and and every breath. Meet Your precious creation who is asking, while discarding his filthy rags as written in Zechariah 3, whose plea was heard in verse four - and said to those who stood before him, "Take the filthy garments off him." And to him he said, "See, I have caused your iniquity to pass from you, and I will clothe you with rich robes." Transform the spirit within to an upright light guiding him, as we rebuke what the devil, the father of sin does and any bad influences and throughs troubling and pushing him down with toxic answers that go against your holiness.. Light up the room and let us talk each and every time with your praise all rejoicing, shouting, and praise full unhindered lips. Fill all opportunities here on earth as we reach the Upgright Spirit for the spirit that overwhelms, overflowing cups everywhere in our daily lives taking your praise all the way into Jesus home where He lives and rules for and into eternity in Jesus' Name that lifts all into the highest mountains
In Jesus Name and nothing else and and where nothing can even be heard by YWVH other than His Only Saviour's name. Amen and truly. Amen.